'Are you alright?' My yoga teacher asked me when we met in the hallway of the yoga studio.
'I was a bit under the weather,' I said. 'I was suffering from a cold. Runny nose, sneezing, bit feverish, you know.'
He nodded and said: 'I missed you in class.'
'You are one of the steady ones. Are you okay now?'
'Yes, I am,' I said.
'See you tomorrow then,' he said.
'Yes, see you tomorrow.' I turned around and felt awful. Why did I say 'See you tomorrow' when the last thing on my mind was to practice yoga the next morning?
For the past two weeks, everybody in the Netherlands got the flu. And the three persons who were lucky enough to not catch this flue, suffered from a terrible cold. Like me. It made me stay at home in and around my bed and to not go to yoga practice for four days. Now I did feel better, but this evening I was going to go to Amsterdam. Do I have to say more? No, because I said I was going to AMSTERDAM.
I spent the evening there, got the last train back home and went to bed at 1.30 AM. I hesitated for a bit when I had to set my alarm. Just do it. 5.30 AM. Because I am a true Ashtangi and will practice no matter what! Tapas and all that! But I just couldn't.
So I slept in and didn't go to practice. Fifth day in a row. The first four days I did not go because of this sneezing, then because I went off to Amsterdam. The sixth day, I was practicing. I was back. I feared having to face my teacher. He would be upset and disappointed. He would yell and scream and send me out of his shala. This didn't happen. But he did ask me why I skipped practice.
'I am so sorry,' I said.
'It is okay,' he said to my surprise. It made me feel more secure.
'Do you want to know what my excuse was?' I asked. I didn't wait for his answer.
'It is only one word.'
'Amsterdam? Yesterday you went to Amsterdam?'
'Did you put on your party face?' He asked.
'Maybe,' I said. 'Well, yes, a bit.'
I think he smiled back at me. Somewhat. I felt relieved. I can still be who I am. A yogi who knows how to party. Sometimes. A bit.