My BF went to Belgium to go on a cycling trip. He was ready to leave the house at 6.15. I smiled at him, kissed him goodbye and turned over for some extra hours of good sleep. When I woke up I felt satisfied and got up. It was 6.55.
I guess for me this is sleeping in these days.
I spent the day walking the streets, picking up coffee at Starbucks (I think it is way too expensive and the cups are too large, but it tastes good and I don't go there very often), did some window shopping, took pictures, did my laundry and some ironing, made chili sin carne (chili con carne without meat) and read The Year of the Owl, a book written by a Dutch woman who was a prosecutor for years, but then her dad passed away and her life went upside down and she started feeling and thinking what she actually wanted to do with her life (I think she was in her early fifties), and it turned out that it was writing. She is a writer now. For me, it was a very inspiring story.
Until my BF came home (around 19.30) I only said Hi, Thank You and Bye to the Starbucks girl and the cashier at the supermarket. I talked to nobody and I tried to keep the activities on my smartphone at a minimum (I texted two friends and my BF and I spent some time on Twitter. I could be worse). I did not feel alone, but maybe that's only because I knew my BF would come home eventually this day.
I used to live alone for six years and I know sometimes I felt lonely and I even remember being glad that I could go to work on Monday so I would have people around me who I could talk to.
But if you want to develop yourself (I think I mean in a spiritual way), you need time by yourself. It is okay to feel lonely, to get bored, to have the feeling you don't know what to do with yourself, because it will get you stronger. Meditate, feel what you feel, comfort yourself, be kind. Find out what you want, what you really want.
I rolled out my yoga mat, but I hardly practiced. I did some stretching and meditating. I know if I want to be an Ashtangi, that I am supposed to practice six times a week, but I need to feel free, need to make some of my own rules in order to feel somewhat independent. I think.
"To write is to fill your paper with the breathings of your heart."