Today is Tuesday. I did my third practice in a row (I am going for the traditional six times this week, just like a real Ashtangi).
Before I entered the shala, I talked to a female Yogi whom I recognized as a Power Yoga teacher (her photo is on the yoga studio's website). She introduced herself and I asked her if she was indeed the Power Yoga teacher. She said yes and told me she taught several classes at a few different yoga studios, and she goes to Mysore Class in the morning just like me to do her own practice. She told me that in our Mysore morning class almost everybody is a yoga teacher. This left me speechless, somehow.
'Have a great practice!' She said and she smiled at me. We entered the shala where I walked to the right side of the room, as where she went to the left.
It got me thinking. Last year, when I was taking as much yoga classes as I could (I liked everything: Power Yoga, Vinyasa, Yin Yoga, Aerial Yoga, Restorative) I soon thought I wanted to be a yoga teacher.
I had really found something sweeter and larger than life. I thought that if I was so enthusiastic about something, that I had to make it my job, my life. And at that point I felt like I could give it all up, my current job, my house, my lifestyle; I was so into this feeling yoga gave me, that I wanted to turn everything upside down for yoga.
I started gathering information about recommended yoga education programs, and there it was: One of the best Asthanga Yoga Teacher Trainings of the Netherlands is provided in the city where I live. No doubt this was a sign that I had to do it.
So I wrote an email, explaining my story and telling them that I absolutely wanted to become a yoga teacher and that I absolutely wanted to attend their teacher training.
They wrote me back and asked if I could come by, to meet one of the teachers and to have a little introduction talk. I had the talk and both the teacher and I were happy about our meeting: I was going to do this. In 2018. This year their training program had already started and I first had to begin practicing Mysore, at their studio. And this is what I am doing now.
But now I am having doubts. I don't know if I want to become a teacher anymore. I do know I want to be a student. I like being a student and I feel and know now that I have so so so so much to learn. I like to learn. And I like being taught by a great teacher. But I don't know if I want to teach yoga myself.
To be continued, I guess.